Christmas Guilt

Here is a response to my blog about making Christmas Merry. As Janet from N.J. points out the expectations come from both sides.

“When my kids were young, I was a single mom struggling. I always tried to compensate at Christmas. One year I couldn’t. For years and years I felt guilty about it. That particular year, I knew there would not be a lot of gifts, so we did tons of stuff together. My “expectations” always were they needed gifts….lots of them.

A few years ago we all were at Don’s house. Don and Diane were preparing the Christmas dinner and didn’t know I was listening to them. I heard them chatting about that particular Christmas. As it turns out, it was their favorite Christmas. That’s how they remembered it. The two of them were in the kitchen laughing and laughing about the stuff we did. Wish I had known that earlier. It would have saved me a lot of guilt. I think they are both pretty cool people.”

This is a wonderful story. We set our own expectations. Is my gift going to be good enough? What if someone gets me a gift and I don’t have one for them? What if my child’s friend gets the hottest toy and I fail to find one? What really matters is “doing tons of stuff together”. You can’t put a price on quality time. What a great time of the year to cut a Christmas tree, decorate the home, have meals together (what a concept) and celebrate the reason for Christmas, Chanukah, and other holy days. As you plan your gifts, don’t forget Janet and the way she compensated for a lack of physical gifts but gave the one gift that meant so much to her son and daughter so many years later – her time.

What are you doing for the holidays? Any advise for others on how to prepare and celebrate the season?? What do you do that is inexpensive but effective?

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Christmas Guilt, Gift Giving Idea, Quality Time