Farmers Almanac
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13 Lines of Laughs

While weather may be the first thing you think about when you hear “Farmers' Almanac,” it's not the only favorite section of this yearly publication. Here are 13 witty one liners that have been featured in previous editions of the Farmers' Almanac.

The trouble with love at first sight is second sight.

More accidents are caused by pickled drivers than by traffic jams.

Always put off until tomorrow what you shouldn't do at all.

No two people are alike and both of them are glad of it.

An optimist is someone who tells you to cheer up when things are going his way.

Money doesn't talk these days –it goes without saying.

Love is a softening of the hearteries.

Money is something you should make first and then make last.

Don't worry it may never happen.

Watch out for school children – especially if they're driving cars.

Wrinkles should merely show where the smiles have been.

Happiness is often the result of being too busy to be miserable.

The quickest way to get a child's attention is to take a nap.

Enjoy your weekend – may it be filled with smiles and laughter.

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  • Cynthia H says:

    very nice – enjoyed them

  • Velma K says:

    This was a good laugh after a long week.

  • If you notice a hole in the upper left-hand corner of your Farmers' Almanac, don't return it to the store! That hole isn't a defect; it's a part of history. Starting with the first edition of the Farmers' Almanac in 1818, readers used to nail holes into the corners to hang it up in their homes, barns, and outhouses (to provide both reading material and toilet paper). In 1919, the Almanac's publishers began pre-drilling holes in the corners to make it even easier for readers to keep all of that invaluable information (and paper) handy.

    Reading Farmers' Almanac on Tablet with Doggie

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